Is the sh!t about to hit the fan in Post Brexit Britain?

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Is the sh!t about to hit the fan in Post Brexit Britain?

Post by Global Administrator »

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https://prospect.org/article/brexit-panic-brits-run-out-toilet-paper

There is palpable sense of panic slowly developing in London. Each Brit consumes 110 toilet rolls a year—two and half time the European average. The United Kingdom is Europe’s biggest importer of loo paper and it is said that only one day’s supply of toilet paper exists in stock.

If Britain leaves the EU Customs Union and Single Market in five months’ time and the trucks transporting toilet paper are held up at Calais or Dover, British bottoms will have to be wiped with torn-up newspapers as in bygone days.

Some 1,300 trucks carrying goods from the continent arrive every day just for the giant German-owned low-cost supermarket chain Lidl. Airbus imports a million components on a just-in-time basis, as do all U.K. automobile manufacturers.

Britain’s economy is now completely integrated in terms of supply and transport into the rest of Europe. There are no more checks and controls on goods, people, toilet rolls, or components going between the continent and Britain than there are on goods or people moving from California to Oregon.

The handling of Brexit by Prime Minister Theresa May has been such a disaster that the chances of a major economic crash are now high. A number of ministries have made very clear that preparations have to start now to deal with the possibility of a no-deal crash-out Brexit.

This sense of panic—the highways of Kent in southern England becoming parking lots for trucks with toilets and canteens, manufacturing firms told to stockpile food, medicine, or components, and Eurotunnel slowing to snail’s pace for the 4,500 trucks using it every day as each fills in customs forms—helps to persuade public opinion and MPs that a no-deal Brexit would be very bad indeed.

The German auto firm BMW is very frightened of losing just-in-time trucks coming in to British BMW plants through the tunnel without any checks, as if they were driving from Munich to Hamburg.

Another aspect is that if any made-in-U.K. components (car engines) are shipped to Bavaria to be put into BMW cars, then the total value of the EU content in the finished car will be quite low. So the cars could not be exported outside Europe on the current basis of existing trade agreements that the European Union has with 70 countries, and could face extra tariffs.

So every day there is more pressure from business to avoid a no-deal Brexit. But this business pressure is not making front-page news, nor is it on TV — it is conversations with ministers and inside business-page stories.




2.5 loo rolls a week AVERAGE for every man woman and child (and I pray they use diapers on kids - so THREE rolls a person a week???) is of course likely due to the national diet of Chip Butties and weak warm beer, but this is a looming crisis, it seems sure.

Maybe they also deep fry loo paper in greasy oil, and eat it as a ''healthy'' snack - like Brittadams?

At Heathrow the drug detector and money detector dogs will be replaced with LOO PAPER decorator sniffing dogs!

Australians will no longer need to mail over 100,000s of Food Parcels as we did for 7 years after WW2 to keep the heavily rationed English eating, but will now need to switch over to LOO ROLL EXPRESS mail. :lol:
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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by Rog »

"Chip Butties and warm beer"

:lol: We used to get fed chip butties at school from the tuck shop. But where does this warm beer thing ever come from? All the pubs I have ever been in for decades (and that's a few) served cold beer. In fact when I was a kid the joke was that you had warm beer in Oz, so it's probably just a general worldwide ribbing. :lol:

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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by Global Administrator »

British tourists here refuse to drink the beer served to them in pubs, and ask it be given 15 seconds in a microwave, so it tastes like just BARK OOM.

Just a cultural thing I understand. :mrgreen:
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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by Rog »

Haha, well I for one would have been happy with the cold ones :lol:

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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by Global Administrator »

H.M. Customs is rushing though restrictions to the Duty Free allowances post Brexit, so that Brits flying BARK OOM may only bring 4 rolls of loo paper per adult, Duty Free.

Bloomberg reports Sorbent is thinking ahead of the game, and is cunningly marketing these slightly larger than usual Loo Rolls in Europe Duty Free ports -
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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by fromdownunder »

What a bummer.

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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by ViccyVFU »

I expect any similar Australian emergency might be handled differently?

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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by Global Administrator »

ViccyVFU wrote:I expect any similar Australian emergency might be handled differently?
We have none of your softie European nancy habits down here.

We have 100 million Melaleuca trees here. They are called Paperbarks. Why? - as the soft bark peels off like paper.

Free, sustainable, carbon positive, fully degradable, grow readily and fast in all states, eco-friendly, and does not need to be imported from Europe!

The EU has turned you lot into WIMPS. :lol:

You think HenryVIII ducked down to ALDI each week for loo paper????
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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by Allanswood »

Nobody in the entire UK makes toilet paper?
What will you do without tissues as well?

You go through 200,000,000 rolls a week and no one local can compete?
That's about 5,000 trucks each week for just loo rolls!

Doesn't sound right. :?:
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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by ViccyVFU »

Yeah, its getting really bad at the moment.

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Only last week we had an official announcement urging us "to use both sides of each sheet".

Scientists are already well advanced on looking at alternatives for us to use .....

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I'm led to believe you guys have similar developments ...?

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:D :D

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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by fromdownunder »

My mind boggles at the thought of using puppies (or Koalas - Koala Bares?) to wipe your bum.

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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by Global Administrator »

Someone emailed me asking if this thread was an April Fools Day joke.

Sadly not - This similar UK report is from March 8 -
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I am setting up a Melaleuca Tree export business. :mrgreen:

https://www.express.co.uk/news/uk/1097716/brexit-news-no-dea ... et-roll-uk


No deal Brexit warning: UK could run out of TOILET ROLL two days after exit claims expert

BRITAIN could run out of toilet paper “within hours” in the event of a no deal Brexit, an industry expert has warned, as a result panic-buying by nervous shoppers.

By Ciaran McGrath

PUBLISHED: 21:17, Fri, Mar 8, 2019 | UPDATED: 12:20, Sat, Mar 9, 2019

Andrew Large, Director General of the industry association Confederation of Paper Industries, made his worrying prediction in an interview with Germany’s Spiegel newspaper days before MPs are due to vote on Theresa May’s withdrawal agreement. Mr Large said the toilet paper supply of the British is "not quite just in time", the phrase applied to industries where items are created to meet demand, not created in surplus or in advance of need.

However, he warned the supply could run out rapidly in the event that Britain crashes out of the bloc on March 29 without a deal in place.

Mr Large said the country’s stocks of toilet roll were "significantly larger" than usual with the industry mindful of potential chaos just around the corner.

He said supplies were enough to last several weeks - if people kept calm.

But he added: “When people start panic buying, they could empty the shelves within hours.

"No system could keep up with that."

In a conclusion which is likely to come as scant consolation, Mr Large also said in the event of a no-deal Brexit “Britain would run out of pretty much everything", including food and medicines.

He added: “The condition would become critical long before we run out of toilet paper."

Mr Large’s words echo similar warnings issued by former Labour Secretary of State of Europe Denis MacShane last month.

Speaking in January, Mr MacShane, who served in Tony Blair’s cabinet from 2002 to 2005, claimed: "The UK is the biggest importer of loo paper in Europe and it only stocks one day's worth of supply.

"If the trucks transporting toilet paper are held up at Calais or Dover, a delay of a day or more could see shops facing shortages."

It’s not the first time Mr MacShane has spoken out about the issue either - in October he said: “If Britain leaves the EU Customs Union and single market in five months’ time and the trucks transporting toilet paper are held up at Calais or Dover, British bottoms will have to be wiped with torn-up newspapers as in bygone days.”

Mr MacShane’s claims over British consumption do not tally with figures published by figures published by statista.com last year.

Statista’s data suggested Britons use 11.4 kilograms of toilet paper a year, equal to 127 rolls, putting the UK third in a world-wide league table topped by the United States (12.7kg/141 rolls) and just behind Germany (12.1kg/134 rolls).

In January, Express.co.uk reported Brexit “survival kits” retailing at £300 were being sold ahead of the UK quitting the EU.

James Blake’s company, Emergency Food Storage UK, launched the Brexit Box in December, and sold more than 600 in the space of a month.

He said: "We tried to put a box together that gives people the basics they would need, it's got 60 portions of main meals plus 48 portions of meat, a water filter and a fire starter in case they need to heat the water.

"The fear has been around ever since the vote happened because nobody knows what is really going to happen.”

A Government spokeswoman told Express.co.uk: "People don't need to stockpile household items."
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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by norvic »

FAKE NEWS!
Whilst the UK manufacturers may be dwarfed by EU (and other) imports they do exist.

http://www.accrol.co.uk/
About Us

Established in 1993, Accrol Papers Ltd is one of Europe’s largest independent soft tissue converters with manufacturing capacity in excess of over 100,000 tonnes per annum.

We manufacture a wide range of household and away-from-home paper products from our purpose built production facility in Lancashire. Paper products including Toilet Rolls, Kitchen Towels and Facial Tissues are manufactured to the highest levels of quality in brands and private labels utilising the latest technological advancements.
http://novatissue.co.uk/
Welcome to Nova Tissue, a family-run UK manufacturer of good value, high quality toilet tissue and kitchen towel for retailers and wholesalers across Europe.

Passionate about paper conversion for over 30 years, we’re experts in consumer toilet tissue and consumer kitchen towel. We create our own brand and bespoke private label products for the consumer and ‘away from home’ markets (including retail multiples, wholesalers, cash and carry outlets, janitorial supplies companies, facilities management companies and hotel/pub/leisure chains) across Europe.
https://startissueuk.co.uk/
Star Tissue is one of the UK’s leading independent manufacturers of hygiene paper products. We manufacture a wide range of household and away-from-home paper products from our custom built production facility in Lancashire.

We offer paper products that are manufactured to the highest standard of quality, together with the flexibility to meet the diverse needs of our valued customers large or small.
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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by Cill Dara »

Global Administrator wrote:Someone emailed me asking if this thread was an April Fools Day joke.


By Ciaran McGrath Sure, that's an Irish name :mrgreen:

PUBLISHED: 21:17, Fri, Mar 8, 2019 | UPDATED: 12:20, Sat, Mar 9, 2019

Andrew Large, Director General of the industry association Confederation of Paper Industries, made his worrying prediction in an interview with Germany’s Spiegel newspaper days before MPs are due to vote on Theresa May’s withdrawal agreement. Ha, another bit of propaganda in a Hun rag. :wink:


He said supplies were enough to last several weeks - if people kept calm. Think of England and cross your legs, as French Customs check every roll s-l-o-w-l-y 8)


Speaking in January, Mr MacShane, who served in Tony Blair’s cabinet from 2002 to 2005, claimed: "The UK is the biggest importer of loo paper in Europe and it only stocks one day's worth of supply.
Sure, that's another Irish name :mrgreen:
[/i]
This is merely a Hun and Paddy rumour to thwart the will of the people. :lol:

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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by thecloudwatcher »

Global Administrator wrote: You think HenryVIII ducked down to ALDI each week for loo paper????
Lucky old Henry had a Groom of the Stool, no need for loo paper when you have someone with a wet rag to clean your nether regions :lol: :lol: :lol:

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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by thecloudwatcher »

Global Administrator wrote:Each Brit consumes 110 toilet rolls a year—two and half time the European average.
I wonder if that figure includes all the toilet roll used by hotel guests, a great many of whom are from overseas?

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Who needs toilet paper?

Post by lsemmens »

A man took a crap in a gas station and then realized there was no toilet paper. There was a hole in the wall and a sign above it that read: "When you go to the bathroom, wipe yourself with your index finger, stick it through this hole and it will be thoroughly cleaned." The man did exactly what the sign said, but when he stuck his finger through the hole, someone at the other side slapped two bricks together against his finger and because of the pain he stuck his finger in his mouth and started to suck on it

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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by Global Administrator »

lsemmens - I promised Cill Dara we would lay off the Irish Jokes. :idea:

He is a huge fan of Brexit, and never upset the Irish. Their memories go back 500 years. :mrgreen:
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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by Parisboy »

My great fear is being forced to use - gulp - Izal.

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Like using sandpaper but everybody pretended that it was "good for you." :shock: :mrgreen:

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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by Cill Dara »

Global Administrator wrote:lsemmens - I promised Cill Dara we would lay off the Irish Jokes. :idea:

Paddy the Irishman and Harry the Englishman are caught in Saudi Arabia drinking. "Under Saudi law you are sentenced to 30 lashes then deported. Before you begin you are entitled to have something on your back.

What would you like?" said the prison guard to the Englishman just before lashing him. Harry, being a bit of a cricket fan, asked for linseed oil.

The guards then came to Paddy the Irishman. "Under Saudi law you are sentenced to 30 lashes then deported. Before you begin you are entitled to something on your back, what would you like?" "Oh", replied Paddy, "I'll have the Englishman".


:wink:
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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by ViccyVFU »

Parisboy wrote:Like using sandpaper
I'm a little curious how you would know that.

Accident in an unlit bathroom? :D

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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by norvic »

Parisboy wrote:My great fear is being forced to use - gulp - Izal.

Image

Like using sandpaper but everybody pretended that it was "good for you." :shock: :mrgreen:

Chris.
Depended on which side you used; one was quite rough but nowhere near as rough as suggested, the other was shiny, with inevitable consequences. Some of us remember it well.
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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by Parisboy »

ViccyVFU wrote:
Parisboy wrote:Like using sandpaper
I'm a little curious how you would know that.

Accident in an unlit bathroom? :D
Friends had an outside toilet with this in it. Wasn't well lit. :shock:

We were pampered at home as we had the soft stuff. :mrgreen:

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So NOW we know where the term ''Chipped Butties'' came from. :lol:
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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by norvic »

Global Administrator wrote:So NOW we know where the term ''Chipped Butties'' came from. :lol:
Now THAT's funny!
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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by johnrcrow »

The Izal paper (hardly a toilet item) was the deluxe item in toilet when a boy in Yorkshire.

I am not sure whether it was better or worse than the paper my dad provided by cutting up the newspaper (Daily Mirror) into rectangles and hanging them inside the outside loo door

His efforts with the Radio Times however, were not appreciated as it had a massive skid factor being a superior paper to newsprint.

Skid factor for IZAL on reflection was similar to Radio Times!

I believe IZAL is still available?

From The Independent
It is a discomfiting thing to learn that Izal loo roll is still available. Not as discomfiting as it used to be, in the days when this slightly abrasive product was routinely found in school toilets and public conveniences, the harsh price of spending a penny away from home. Today it is not – quite – so harsh.

San Izal has been rebranded Izal, and the tissue seems less unforgiving than before. Make no mistake, this is not the sort of roll that the Andrex puppy would like to romp around with, but it is just a little less austere than before. The scent of disinfectant seems also to have disappeared, which is a bit of a shame for those who like their khazi karma nice and traditional.

It is difficult to believe that, in a world of ultra-soft pastel-hued lavatorial opulence, such a throwback to the age of austerity will still be bought out of choice (it is not particularly cheap either). Some websites market it as a "novelty product". Nostalgia, surely, has its limits: there's no need to scrape the bottom of the barrel.

We’ll tell you what’s true. You can form your own view.

Nice link to origins of IZAL in Chappletown (not fear from my boyhood home).


http://s10probus.co.uk/the-history-of-izal-joan-jones-7th-march-2016/

Here is a bit from article.

The scratchy toilet paper, impregnated with Izal disinfectant and every sheet printed with the legend ‘Now wash your hands’ (not to mention, in some cases, ‘Property of British Railways’ if I remember correctly), was at first given away to local authorities who bought bulk supplies of hygiene products, before being marketed as a commodity in its own right.

During the Second World War, Izal produced sheets of toilet paper overprinted with cartoon illustrations of Adolf Hitler, which were popular with customers but frowned upon by the government because ‘it wasn’t really the British thing to do.’

Some of Izal’s health giving claims, and the diseases it would help prevent, might seem rather far fetched by today’s advertising standards. Restrictions on the use of poisons, and increased competition from more modern products, lessened Izal’s market dominance, although it was still a major profit maker for Newton Chambers until the 1970s.

The company, which had once employed 8,000 people, was sold off and split up, although the Izal factory continued to be run until 1981 by Sterling Health, who also bought the Ronseal DIY brand which still survives at Chapeltown.

But in the end, production of Izal medicated toilet paper at the North Sheffield factory fell victim to the accountants’ bottom line, as the bottoms of Britain opted for something a little more comfortable.

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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by vikingeck »

I’m trying to recall when and where it was on my travels that in return for the appropriate small coin in a saucer the concierge lady doled out a single sheet!

No it wasn’t in the UK.
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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by fromdownunder »

vikingeck wrote:I’m trying to recall when and where it was on my travels that in return for the appropriate small coin in a saucer the concierge lady doled out a single sheet!

No it wasn’t in the UK.
It happened to me and my wife in Noumea. Public toilet with separate entrances for men and women. We each went to our own entrance and met each other again on the other side, with a man in between the two entrances selling the toilet paper. Then the corridor split into two with separate entrances for setters and pointers.

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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by hatter »

so glad others find the uk's implosion so amusing :mrgreen:
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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by Global Administrator »

hatter wrote:So glad others find the UK's implosion so amusing :mrgreen:
No the amusing part is yet to come, when your alleged Parliament finally decides to do something going forward.

Dad's Army looks like a model of order and professionalism, compared to your elected mega bumblers!
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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by johnrcrow »

In N. Vietnam a piece of toilet paper was on sale outside the communal loo.

Is this a way forward?

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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by norvic »

gavin-h wrote:Image
Where's Glenn put his glasses?
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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by gavin-h »

norvic wrote:Where's Glenn put his glasses?
He's set them on one side because he's going to clean them with "2700 Gentle RPMs" when he's finished doing what he'd doing. :mrgreen:

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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by bazza4338 »

The following is informative - and might explain at the bottom :oops: why some people in some countries use more toilet paper than others.

https://travel.stackexchange.com/questions/21994/how-to-use-toilet-paper

Well, there is a website dedicated to this! It illustrates the process:

HowToWipeYourButt.com

Here are the steps from that site in a nutshell:

You have to remain seated for the whole wiping process. Start out with a decent size wad of tissues, three balled-up squares should be enough. Reach around and behind your butt, and lean into the opposing cheek. Start wiping with the pointer, middle and ring fingers. Use moderate pressure and wipe at a cautious speed from front to back. Repeat this step with the same amount of tissue until the amount of remnants on the paper decreases by fifty percent.

For the second step, the amount of tissues should be reduced. Two crumbled squares should be enough at this stage. Follow the same directions of step 1 (with the reduced paper amount) but using more pressure with each wipe. Continue until the amount of remnant on the tissue decreases to a small amount.

The paper in the step should be decreased to one folded square. This really is sufficient. Repeat the same direction from step 1, but now you should be using significant pressure. As you pass over your anus, relax the sphincter and slightly press the pad of your middle finger into the opening, continue the progression from front to back. Repeat this step until there is very little to no remnants transferring onto the paper.

The final step which is often ignored, is to use a wet wipe, repeat step 3 until absolutely no remnants remain. This step is to ensure fresh, thorough clean that is second only to a bath or shower. This will reduce any staining, odor or itching that may occur later.

Flush, adjust your clothing, wash your hands with soap and water.

Also, this video explains it well.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YJCZOvjmBIA



Then there are those people who just pull the paper through from front to back until it comes out clean :roll:

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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by fromdownunder »

Too much information... FAR too much information.

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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by gavin-h »

I suspect the truth is more to do with quality of plumbing. In many parts of Europe, old narrow pipes mean that used paper must be put in a bin because flushing would block the pipes - parts of Greece, Spain, Portugal, France etc for instance.

British plumbing, while often old, generally has wide pipes and is gloriously over-engineered in the Victorian fashion and you could flush the whole packet down, let alone a generous bottom-wiping's-worth of sheets. :idea:

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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by kuikka »

I think also the type of paper matters. In Finland the binder of toilet paper is water soluble. After a short while in water toilet paper has lost its strength an tears very easily. It cannot blog any pipes. On other hand, for example in kitchen paper or newspaper the binder is not water soluble and could block narrow pipes.

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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by donsanto46 »

I have the cure for your TP problems -Wizzy wipes wizzywipes.com (not to be confused with Wysiwipes).

Wizzies are a compressed roll of paper that looks like it belongs in the WC of your little girl's doll house, but when you wet it, it becomes this large paper towel. 10 can fit in a small medicine bottle. Good for camping, kids, and bug out bags. I assume you can get or import them in your country.

I have lived in primitive conditions both as a child and in the military so I don't have a problem with "lack of's" as a rule. I checked out the How to wipe your butt site - the creator of that should start performing that on stage as a stage show - 2 weeks in Las Vegas and they could retire to a Bahamas beachfront condo. After step 3 I would have to break out the corncobs.

I have also been in several shortage situations (mostly weather related) including the 1989 7.0 Loma Prieta earthquake in California where power and everything were out for a week or more. While Everyone was at the liquor store loading up (I already kept a supply of booze on hand- for "medicinal reasons" you know)

I was in the store with a cart loaded with gallon jugs of water and a case of TP, as in every disaster I've seen those were the first things to go, AND get them RIGHT AWAY before the store stops doing business due to the power outage - ALWAYS keep some CASH on hand because your card won't work, and the store will take CASH ONLY.

Sure as hell the next day there were no stores open and NO TP or Water (why water? - the water in your pipes may have been contaminated (even in a flood) by a broken pipe or ??, and you may not have a way to boil it - iodine and chlorine bleach tastes nasty).

ALSO, REMEMBER if you have a flush toilet and HAVENT FLUSHED IT (and it isn't leaking) there is 5 gal. of drinkable/usable water in the tank (at least in the US regular toilets) it tastes musty but is better than no water.

If you have children or a picky spouse, you have to consider them, AND DON'T FORGET YOUR PETS! SORRY, I'll stop here as I'm getting off topic and I didn't mean this to turn into a survivalists forum.
Last edited by Global Administrator on 07 Apr 2019 15:37, edited 1 time in total.
Reason: As usual for this member, needed to add pars and spacing and "air" to UNJAM it all - always a great idea on all posts on Bulletin Boards!

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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by donsanto46 »

SORRY, I'm new and will do better.

I didn't know how much space you allot.

Some boards cut you off after so many characters, with spaces and the space left over at the end of your sentence counting as characters as well, and my post ran a bit long.

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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by Allanswood »

You can type to your hearts content, it's not Twitter.
You're allowed about 75,000 characters, maybe more. :D

In case your wondering, that's about 25 pages of A4/Letter typed text.
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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by Global Administrator »

johnrcrow wrote:In N. Vietnam a piece of toilet paper was on sale outside the communal loo.

Is this a way forward?
We spent much of January in India and Nepal, and the scam there is, there is no loo paper (indeed often squat toilets!) but for a 50 Rupee note the ever present LooWallah came to your rescue with a measly scrap or two of paper!

Post Brexit Britain should look at this, as it boosts employment enormously. :idea:

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Re: Is the s*** about to hit the fan in Brexit Britain?

Post by fromdownunder »

Global Administrator wrote:We spent much of January in India and Nepal, and the scam there is, there is no loo paper (indeed often squat toilets!) but for a 50 Rupee note the ever present LooWallah came to your rescue with a measly scrap or two of paper!

Glen
When my ex and I were in Noumea many moons ago (probably 1970's), we went to some public toilets where there were separate men's and women's entrances, which struck me as quite normal.

What was weird about it was that we met again on the other side, with a man inside directly between to the two entrances selling the toilet paper by the sheet.

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Re: Is the sh!t about to hit the fan in Post Brexit Britain?

Post by satsuma »

When travelling in many countries, some of which have already been mentioned, I pack one or two of these. There are other brands, too.
Image

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Re: Is the sh!t about to hit the fan in Post Brexit Britain?

Post by Waffle »

This is the greatest load of **it that I have ever read. I wuz brung up proper, never to swear/curse or use obscene language especially in Female company. A pity that, some of our supposed betters, who live in priviledged suburbs, do not have similar civilised manners. I have already told off, a fellow stampboarder, re swearing. IT is offensive to many people! My parents would have used my fathers belt if I had done so, and rightly so. I sadly deplore the falling standards we seem to accept as normal. By the way, the correct term is FAECES.
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Re: Is the sh!t about to hit the fan in Post Brexit Britain?

Post by Allanswood »

satsuma wrote:When travelling in many countries, some of which have already been mentioned, I pack one or two of these. There are other brands, too.
Image
Why take them?

I avoid all embarrassment and many amused glances by just packing a couple of travel packs of plain old tissues - the sort that fit in your pocket and hold 10. No one bats an eyelid.
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Re: Is the sh!t about to hit the fan in Post Brexit Britain?

Post by worldstamps »

Global Administrator wrote:
2.5 loo rolls a week AVERAGE for every man woman and child (and I pray they use diapers on kids - so THREE rolls a person a week???) is of course likely due to the national diet of Chip Butties and weak warm beer, but this is a looming crisis, it seems sure.

Maybe they also deep fry loo paper in greasy oil, and eat it as a ''healthy'' snack - like Brittadams?

At Heathrow the drug detector and money detector dogs will be replaced with LOO PAPER sniffing dogs!
3 Rolls per person a week - maybe the British rolls are only 25 or 50 sheets long or something?

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Re: Is the sh!t about to hit the fan in Post Brexit Britain?

Post by Somerset »

It won't matter whether toilet rolls can get to us, or not. As soon as we leave: unemployment will rise to 100%, disease and famine will stalk the land, there will be seven plaques (think that one is from the Bible not the BBC).

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Re: Is the sh!t about to hit the fan in Post Brexit Britain?

Post by Ubobo.R.O. »

Not a Cill Dara quote then ?
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Re: Is the sh!t about to hit the fan in Post Brexit Britain?

Post by satsuma »

Somerset wrote:It won't matter whether toilet rolls can get to us, or not. As soon as we leave: unemployment will rise to 100%, disease and famine will stalk the land, there will be seven plaques (think that one is from the Bible not the BBC).
Perhaps you mean plagues?

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